> Live in fuck all North Carolina
> Local group plans to host a "New Years Rave"
> Oh cool, never been to a rave before, why not
> Find a ride with 4 other guys inside someone's shitty pickup, drive an hour out
> ThisIsABarn.mp3
> Turns out, Kegger at a barn first, beer pong with rednecks, they're chill
> Drive another 45 mins into another small town for "Rave"
> It's in a Moose Lodge/Rec Center
> There's no drugs or alcohol allowed, selling Monsters (Original Green) for $1/can, Drink 5 of them because they ran out of water
> Darude and Zombienation remixes, there's a few girls here with almost no clothes on
> Driver has disappeared, find him basically inside a ratty old couch making out with a chick
> Go cover a side room in glowstick juice
> 2 hours later, everyone is hungry, go to find driver
> Still getting his face eaten by an Oompa Loompa
> Wait another hour, finally go, pack everyone including Oompa Loompa into truck
> Start driving to nearest Waffle House because friend works there and we're all broke. Hope to get discounts.
> Arrive at Waffle House, go inside, it's fucking packed
> Realize it's all the rednecks from the barn party
> Friend is manager on shift because Store Manager is no where to be seen
> Start making ridiculous orders, drop the shades, people bring in booze from their trucks, making Gin and Juice
> Meth head linecook is in his Witness Me phase and just pumping shit out, straight up Hash Slinging Slasher
> People now smoking inside, people drinking, fights in the parking lot
> Leave before cops come, Driver realizes later that he left Oompa Loompa in a strange wafflehouse with a bunch of friendly rednecks, assume everything will be fine and go on with our day.

Hashbrowns Smothered, Covered, and Chunked, 2 orders of bacon, and a chocolate chip waffle on the side. Absolutely hit the spot.

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