>be policymaker
"We are tired of funding social science research that can't be replicated. A million dollars to anyone who produces QUALITY social science research"
>Scientists gets grant for highly objective, highly replicable basic behavior research in birds
>Research much cheaper and IRB-feasible than primate research
>Research can reduce the cost of future research in other animals and humans by piloting methods and processes
"No, not like that! Let's give $3,000,000 to a bunch of Marxist sociologists to study homelessness"
>Sociologists pay temporarily sober methheads/formerly homeless to interview currently homeless
>Sociologists recruit ex-homeless interviewers as they 'will work better because they will trust them'
>Sociologists take homeless informants at their word when homeless say they are local to the region and give other info
>Critics ask, "15% of your sample self-reported as homeless veterans, why didn't you confidentiality
verify veteran status as an independent benchmark? You could even connect them to services"
>Sociologists scoffs, 'such probing questions would scare them off'
>Critics ask, 'Can we see your structured interview?
>Sociologists 'Sorry, the exact questions are proprietary'
>Sociologists point to the Silicon Valley statistics firm that crunched the numbers, 'the statistics are on our side.'
"Wow, what quality research!", explain the politicians, "The homeless are temporarily downtrodden locals who just need a boost. See? The homeless report that they are victims of violence, not the perpetrators! if only we could explain why homeless who live in areas where one can safely smoke meth or crack, without being victimized by the police, are so often reporting being victims of rape. Maybe next time the sociologists can see if white prep school kicks are raping homeless people."

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Are scientists in competition to see who can waste the most of other people's money in the most absurd and grandiose fashion?