i was the one who stopped talking, i know she is still single. i just dont know how to start talking again
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"/adv/ - Advice" is 4chan's board for giving and receiving advice.
i was the one who stopped talking, i know she is still single. i just dont know how to start talking again
It's over
>leave
It's not that simple. And after all this time I just can't.
The next day she called me and said her husband was waiting for her in the door and she told her everything and now they'll work out where the relationship will turn. A few days later we met and she told me they're trying again. I told her it's no surprise to me, that's what I was expecting. This happened in early April.
She still keeps checking me on a messaging app where I'm her only contact.
I know we're both morally guilty for having an affair, no need to tell me that.
I can't get her out of my head, she's beautiful, an introvert like me, and she loves nature and animals.
What do? How to fix?
picrel is very much adolf kitler
But when i think about riding a dildo or dick i get instantly rock hard
Im starting to question my sexuality
>noticed red bumps/pimples on her back
>was clean and attractive apart from that
>she could barely fit it in her mouth past the head
>blew me for around an hour
>head was mediocre at best
>busted a fat nut and left
>did not fuck her or do anything else
>did not notice any sores/wounds in her mouth or any blood anywhere
Am I fucking cooked bros, can I really receive hyper aids from some saliva on the tip of my penis
I know I am retarded
Quit porn for 2 years and was on no fap for 2 weeks, was not thinking straight
Help
(Get it of your Chest)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k9gDJXfKg-s
I don't really know from where this thought came, it's just sit there now and slightly buzzing me out like a fly. Psychiatrist, who was also providing psychotherapy and to whom I addressed this situation, said that this thought comes from the external pressure from society's majority and I should not listen to it but try to figure this out by myself at my own pace, but I feel like I could live my life like this and not doing anything better
So, what should I do here? Should I just drop myself in anything and see how it goes even if I don't like it from the start?
In next post I'll provide some facts on my current state of things so it would be easier for you to formulate any advice that you can provide here.
Pharma is insane psycho shit and these drugs are withdrawal scams. But I do want to stop overthinking and get somewhere in life.
I'm thinking of buying the hair trimmers pack from Costco, going into the woods or something, and cutting my hair out there
why tho
How to Get Women General is by men, for men, about women, so bring all of your questions about getting and dealing with women here. Some anons on this site actually get laid, and some of those even want to help. If you're trying to meet and date women, then this is the place to ask questions, seek advice, and share experiences. We know how hard it can be. We got you bro.
>What is /htgwg/ not?
These threads are NOT for whining, moping, incels, volcels, MGTOW, hopelessness, or demoralization. We're all aware that meeting and dating women is hard these days, and even harder for some, but /htgwg/ is for men trying to overcome the challenges. IGNORE the posters who complain, who have given up, or who insist that there's nothing they can do. This site has other boards and threads that they can fuck off to.
BE SMART: Spot the bait, don't reply, and DON'T WASTE TIME ARGUING WITH THEM!
>How to ask for advice
Context is important: be more specific than "This girl ghosted me, why?" We can't help if we don't know the situation, so try to provide as much (useful) info as possible ("I was at the bar, this chick was checking me out..."). What's your relationship with the girl? How long have you known her? Any conversation screenshots? Etc...
Don't forget to ask an actual question.
>Books and Resources
"Models": https://ufile.io/f/jrw9j (expired?)
"No More Mr Niceguy": https://libgen.li/edition.php?id=143167290
"Mystery Method": https://pastebin.com/cMHcY4dc (old pastebin)
"The Pussy": https://z-lib.is/book/the-pussy-
Dr. NerdLove: https://www.doctornerdlove.com/blog/ (a bit cringe but decent advice)
Leykis 101: https://pastebin.com/7U5Sdhwq (something to listen to)
(not all of these are fully vetted, new suggestions are welcome)
REMEMBER: It's good to read and prepare, but don't overdo it. Get off this site: go learn and build up your social skills by meeting actual women in the real world.
Previous: >>31146132
What would you advise me to do?
I've posted here a few times before but have never been able to break myself out of this cycle of thinking, but I can't go on like this. I either accept that this is the way that things turned out for me and that I'll never experience that happiness again or off myself but I'm too scared. How can I accept this?
I Don't Know What Edition
When this happened, she even told me I am the best as I said some words of affirmation that day, as she got her periods. Now, as I was going to hit the gym, I informed her real quick as my phone was on the verge of dying out of battery. Next, I play a sport as a cardio, after gym, as I went in to charge my phone before playing, I see a text from her saying that I don't care about her and I have been ignoring her. I told her that my phone was out of battery, but she wasn't taking that as a reason. I even showed her a screenshot, but she wasn't ready to understand. I didn't know what to reply and my friend was waiting for me to play, so I told her that let's talk after I come back.
As I came back she was even more upset that I wanted to play sport, while I should be with her, saying that I don't even care about her and I am the worst person ever. She also said "You only come to me when you are horny" which made me like wtf, like I have tried to love her as much, but it gets more and more demanding and then I get this. It makes me sh*t scared about what to do, and even just touch her, I don't know what she might allege about it. I don't know that this is even worth continuing as the very thought of her thinking about me like that makes me feel terrible.
>when they think they can hurt me but i married a man who will forever be in contact with his ex due to them having kids together
>why aren't you going after women, anon? Are you retarded?
WTF am I supposed to do?
share your thoughts and feelings
>This makes me depressed
>I can't find a job in my field because I'm fat
>Eat to cope with the depression
>I'm fat....
I would get friendzoned or ghosted. My pics didn't look any different from me IRL, some girls even said I look better IRL than in my profile pics.
Either way in 2022 I cold approached for less than a month and got a girlfriend out of it for over a year.
After we broke up I dated 4 women I met online this year and the same story - unavaiable, ghosting and friendzoned.
So my question is - if it happened already once, would it happen again if I tried cold approach? Should I do it?
For some reason I wasn't as socially anxious as I am nowadays. Or was it just a complete fluke then?
info cultural population
USA
In 2022, there were an estimated 47.9 million people who self-identified as Black, making up 14.4% of the country's population. This marks a 32%
https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/fact-sheet/facts-about-the-us-black-population/
New Jersey
The 5 largest ethnic groups in New Jersey are White (Non-Hispanic) (53.8%), Black or African American (Non-Hispanic) (12.5%), Asian (Non-Hispanic) (9.69%), White (Hispanic) (8.89%), and Other (Hispanic) (6.74%).
https://datausa.io/profile/geo/new-jersey#:~:text=The%205%20largest%20ethnic%20groups,(Hispanic)%20(6.74%25).
![4-16[1]](https://i.4cdn.org/adv/1714522418371242s.jpg)
>constant anxiety I will be yelled at
>constant feelings of shame
>feel like some hideous golum creature
>hide away and isolate to try to mitigate this
>isolation and avoidance make people think I'm weird, so I avoid even more
>always on edge and never comfortable
>nightmares every night
>years and years pass me by
I wish I wasn't a neurotic weirdo and could just be normal. Therapists just give positive talk which is lame. Apparently there's no answers?
>have mental health issues that haven't really been "labelled" but basically i struggle with constant intrusive thoughts, anxiety, irritability, self consciousness, dread, hopelessness, lack of self worth, grandious delusional tendencies, paranoia, short attention spam, dissociation from reality, depamine addiction, comfort addiction, lack of basic common sense, lack of self discipline, fear of abandonment, lack of employable skills (worked a total of 3 years in minimun wage jobs over the span of 10 years), dropped out of collage, addiction to prescription medication (the withdrawals of which make the previous symptoms amplified)...just off the top of my head
>the results of all these issues have lead to a very dysfunctional life as you can probably imagine
Okay so what the fuck is going on with me and how do i fix this shit before it's too late, if it's not too late already. I've tried
>meditation
>exercise
>reading the bible + other books
I'm not consistant enough or have the discipline but I'm trying to dedicate a part of my daily routine to these three things. No idea how they will pay off or if there's anything else i should add to the list. Pls halp
>>31157744
The second one was really drunk and we danced for a bit, but later she just walked away too. How do I move past the introduction phase?
I don't need a job anymore (I have a lot of money that I made in my early 20s). I have a reason not to kill myself but I don't have a reason to pursue goals anymore. Even the video games I used to love as a kid are becoming somewhat of a miserable tumor on my life (like so many other things).
>you shouldn't be dishonest to your partner!!1!1
Enjoy losing your perfect match in literally every conceivable way except they arbitrarily don't like how many people you fucked
>t. young guy who has slept with 50ish women but I only "count" my long term partners for body count when it comes up
I have heard advice to not chase women and got no results. I am also putting a lot of effort into things I can control, such as my appearance, education, and finances.
I will say with the couple I saw earlier, the man was overweight, but compensated in other ways such as by rubbing his girlfriend’s back. He looked to be fairly neurotypical. It would seem the girl felt comfortable around him, as she leaned into him while he held her. So looks sadly are not everything.
I am at wits end here. If nothing else I will go to a foreign country to have sex with prostitutes by the end of this year. Does this sound like a good plan? And if anyone has experience where I can do this safely, please do tell.
Other times at home I am a paranoid mess.
I used to think that I might be a psychopath or a sociopath but I care about people. Is it all just trauma? Why am I so unstable?
Pls help random /adv/ incels and feds
People love to talk, and when they speak to me, I have a long elaborate reply in my head that would birth great conversations. But all that comes out of this mouth of mine is "yes" or "no". In a 12-hour shift, the combined time I speak is about a minute in length. This has resulted in making even the most talkative blabbers be quiet around me, because they know I'm autistic or something and that I probably wouldn't give anything more than a single sentence reply back.
How do I fix this? I really don't want to be like this, but something is preventing me from speaking. This has prevented me from forging friendships and I still have none to call my friend. This has also prevented me from fostering good relations at work.
Grew up getting bitched by my abusive father, wasn’t even allowed to look him In the eye when speaking, always beat me when he would get drunk, led to low self esteem and social anxiety
> Whenever I get mad my voice starts to quiver and I start to tear up / cry
How do I fix this? I’ve improved a ton since ending all contact with father. I worked construction for two years and finally grew tough skin.
I got rid of my social anxiety and can tell someone to fuck of (nothing too serious) but I still cant seem to stand up for myself. I was In a situation earlier today where I wanted to fight this dumb spic at work, as I started to get angry and yell shit my voice started to quiver, knowing I can’t get angry without crying like a bitch I walked away before I embarrassed myself. It’s the point of confrontation that fucks me up, Idk why
How do I fix this? If I keep on letting this stuff like this slide I’ll always be a pushover. Im saving up my money to join an MMA class so I can actually defend myself but how do I deal with the fear?
What should I do bros?
>4 years med school
>only 10% acceptance rate in my country
>5 years residency for surgeon
I have some issues (but no I never wanted to be a frontline officer) Because I am not a stable person and I am aware of that.
Anyways. While I’m away I have been fasting. My parents threaten to take me to the hospital as a 22 year old man.
I told them I won’t start eating because I have a plan, and if they want to ensure my safety they should pick up multivitamins and I’ll take those if they leave me alone.
They got them and seemed to ease up a bit at day 15 of me not eating.
I know what I’m doing but would I be better off just lying to them that I am eating? And not giving them bizarre conditionals where I take vitamins they pay for in exchange for their silence?
The whole situation seems shifty and I don’t want them forcing me to a hospital OR giving me vitamins but I always just keep skiing moguls.
> No I only started fasting like a day ago its fine
> Of course I use the vitamins.
> Yeah I’ll talk to my doctor
All lies. I don’t feel like I need to include them in this so whats wrong with lying.
I was her first everything, kiss, sex, she told me I was the first person to even make her laugh until her tummy hurt.
And I was her first heartbreak, and I'm talking a real heartbreak.
She told a mutual friend that she still has feelings for me but that I hurt her so much she can only be "best friends" with me now.
And I worry about her because she's very naive, she's prone to being pushed around and peer pressured, manipulated.
And she has low self-esteem, avoids confrontations by agreeing with everyone and she's a lonely girl too.
It'll probably hurt me when she eventually finds a new guy.
But I just worry about her a lot.
I hate that we can't date anymore, but I still worry about her.
Pic completely unrelated.
BUT
You're depleted of sex. Everything is perfect but sex is unexistent. Like from one time to another your partner became asexual. Everything still as perfect as always but your partner is always non available for sex, and when you DO have sex you feel like your partner is just doing you a favor.
What would you do?
pic unrelated
Any tips? I'm Gonna try and just get out of bed and go gym in the morning instead of scrolling and having to gym in the evening.
So any advice by the time I hopefully get back would be greatly appreciated
ffw to ytd
>we go on our usual date
>gf is happy, smiling, laughing, holding my hand etc
>overall a bit distant but still normal, I chalk it up to work/family which she has issues with
>after dinner I sit down next to her and ask her whats up
>she asks if we can go back to being friends, coz she feels she cannot give me what I deserve and has past trauma which she cannot open up about, not even to her friends
>hits me like truck, at a loss on what to do or say
>I ask if this is what she wants, she says yes
>I ask if she still has feelings for me, she also says yes
>I just sit there in silence, we eventually leave together in silence too, and we split up for the journey home
i just cried for the first time in 10+ years. after being alone for so long, I was starting to hope again and see a future with her, exploring and trying new things, travelling, etc, which we all discussed previously. when I last took her out a week ago everything was fine, we were joking who would miss each other more as she was out of town for the weekend. a couple weeks ago she started opening up to me about some of her emotions and i was so happy
what do, bros? idk what to do anymore. everything is up in smoke now, and idk what I did wrong. i don't want this to end like this
Now I'm back home and still no gf. Not even a prospect of one. Not even signs of interest.
Maybe a few women looked at me for 2 seconds only because we were passing by each other.
And I tried to give hints to women by looking at them.
>It's over at this point, isn't it?
Today I couldn't finish the meal, I was too exhausted. I spent 30 minutes on a plate of spaghetti. For lunch I gave up on the ramen. I left half of the noodles.
I thought it would get better, but my triggers only get worse and more inconvenient, and it's beginning to happen in public. At the parking lot, I freeze. I spent 3-5 minutes getting in and out of my car. It is becoming hell.
What can I do aside from "seeking help", which I want to do during an episode, but it's so good in between....... Any advice you guys can give me?
I have never gotten a raise. I have asked, I was told it's not possible.
I've been searching for a better job for nearly two years and I haven't been able to find anything better. I get rejected from every job I apply to.
I'm at my wits end, I'm almost 30. I feel like I will never find a better job. Is it over? Starting to wonder if it's the job market, or just me that's unemployable.
>Have no issues
>On a roll mentally
>Confident, etc
>In the shower, imagining how good everything is
>Suddenly feel irrational stress creeping up, not sure why and from where
>Still feeling good, but stress increasing
>"You should totally google her and see what's new"
>"You shouldn't, actually"
>Stress increasing
>"You should"
>"Don't, just continue like before, what is the matter with you"
>Stress and anxiety increasing
>"I'll just Google real quick, no harm done"
>3 hours later I'm on /adv/ and currently coping and seething
Is this common? How do I prevent the initial spark of anxiety that puts me in this mind state? I can sense it appearing at the time, but when it does, it just grows worse and worse
I've had no issues for 3 days prior to this.... Now, all I want is for tomorrow to come, so I can head out and conquer the world again (and get her off my mind)
The idea is to do this when getting shot in airsoft to make me fear getting shot, idea being i treat airsoft guns more like real guns, bla bla milsim bla bla. If this isnt enough lets go with masochism instead.
Right now im thinking some light abrasion caused by one of those green dishwashing scrubs paired with hot sauce/ lemon juice/ alcohol. Keep in mind I havent looked too deep into any of these, im still brainstorming, but any words of caution are appreciated.
Any suggestions?
I work in a fairly in demand field and I see job openings for it throughout the country, so finding work wouldn't be a challenge. I have a decent amount of savings so I don't think this would put me in dire straits. Overall it seems doable.
Has anyone here ever done this or know anyone who has? What kind of advice would you give me? I just want to leave my life behind and become as much of a new person as I can.
I make 80K a year, so not too bad, but I just despise this shit.
I literally got my dream job making animations for Sony and I hate it. I’m always behind on projects and, everyone including my boss is nice which just makes me feel shittier about how flaky I am. I never liked working in school I just want to be a house husband to my boyfriend it makes managing my health (I have a disease) so much easier
>grew up masturbating by either humping objects or rubbing the top of my dick like a woman would her clit
>this resulted in a dick that can't get hard above a downward 45 degree angle
>loses erection very quickly, and is also semi soft
>when banging the base is also flimsy and not rigid so if the girl is riding cowgirl it feels like it might snap
>also live with mom who is unemployed and home 24/7 and have no lock on my door to fap, which is part of the reason I fap that way to begin with, so I wouldn't get caught by just rubbing in my pants
>kinda hard to get it in because the muscle should be long and stiff, but instead feels like there are segments to my shift that can bend pretty drastically
Wtf do I do? Nobody has really said anything and it helps that it's long and thick, but I want rock hard stiff boners again...
Should I move out as soon as she gets a job (it's been over a year now since she was employed and it's making me pissed) and spend my free time gooning to train my dick to stay straight again? Or do I just tell my mom my dick is messed up and I'm gonna fap everyday until it's fixed?
>Has a BF and I'm not interested. Just friends
>Have small class project to do
>We both agree to work on it the next day after class is done
>Finish up our tests at different times that day
>Can't find her anywhere
>Call her up, ask "where are you?"
>"At home. Why wassup?
>"What do you mean at home? Remember the project?"
>"Oh I forgot! I'm sorry"
>End up doing the project at my place later so no big deal
>Didn't do well on test
>Talking to her
>She did better
>Tells me if I'm not doing well we can study together, just ask her and we can do a study session
>OK.
>Plan a study session via teams chat and send out reminder she agreed on
>Day comes
>Shes not there
>No response to text nor call
>4 hours later from her: "hey"
>"Hey? Remember the study session?"
>"Oh shit sorry dude. I forgot. Ill get on now"
>How do you "forget" when the invite is literally right above your text message?
>Get on video call
>First thing I ask her is if she's got something going on cause that's twice she just "Forgot"
>Claims nothings going on
>5 minutes in she gets a call
>"Hey I'll be right back it's my aunt. Give me like 10 minutes"
>Annoyed "OK"
>Still not back after an hour
>Text her "Yo?"
>She responds and we get back in videochat
>Asks me if we can study tomorrow in the morning cause its late
>Fine. Plan and agree on the time again and send the invite
>Study session time again
>Shes not there. Not answering phone
> Fuck it!
>End up just studying by myself
>Next day. Pass the test
>See her and she acts like nothing happened
>Text her to call me after shes done with the test
>Starts apologizing saying she thought she responded to me
>She had to do something with her family, etc,
>Says she'll call me when she gets home
>"its a long story. BTW how did you do on your test?"
>I didn't respond.
I've dated girls that flaked on me less than this women. I'm trying not to go off on her when I see her tomorrow. How do I talk to her about being a shitty friend?
So which advice is solid to hold my attention for just 5 minutes on this platform?
This is the last time I'm asking you this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kVNWTw_lA-s
Now I'm an adult, and I still get zero attention from women or people in general even though people less outgoing and with less money than me do.
What am I doing wrong? I'm not fat or anything and I'm well-groomed.
>Recently got a job as a door to door salesman selling charity
>Been working for almost a month now
>Pay is full commission making about 70 dollars a sale
>Job teaches a lot of skills with the boss teaching us new things every morning
>Can only make about 2 sales a day, sometimes I make one, Sometimes none
>Struggle to find the motivation to keep going
This job seems like it has a lot of potential but I don't know if I should stay with it, Could make more money wage slaving minimum wage but this job has the potential to make a lot of money, What should I do?
Which makes me more attractive, which makes me look more reliable and trustable and more like a nice human to deal with?
Basically, which of the two would make me more success with the opposite sex and which of the two would make an HR pick me more likely.
>Never had any friends (not even in kindergarden)
>lost almost all contact with my father (he's an asshole btw)
>hate my stepfather
>don't dislike my mother, but she doesn't give a shit about me
>most men make fun of me
>lost all non-sexual attraction to women due to resentment
The closest I ever came to genuinely caring about someone was my ex back when I was a teenager, but after we broke up I realized I was probably just a practice bf for her.
I feel lonely when I'm alone but whenever I'm with other people I feel like I'm surrounded by enemies.
Where are all the women that don’t use fake tan? Are they all hiding in wales or Northern Ireland?
What worked for you guys?
>actually have the experience to pull it off
>have a clear vision of what I want the game to look like
>no idea of what the gameplay should be
Tell me games with unique/interesting mechanics so I can study them and piece mine together.
I want to buy a house to live there AND for lodging. the housing market in my touristic area seems particularly bad atm and I'm trying to take advantage of it with the cash I've managed to save, but the best located properties all sell at, say, 120k and want 100k AT LEAST, but I have 90k in cash, not enough to pay that. also, the cheapest houses have the shittiest constructions, which means I'd have to rebuild from almost zero.
I have at least 3 options right now:
- shitty old wooden house + 700sq.ft. lot for 100k (original price 110k). well located (relatively far from the city center but not by much, relatively close to the beach) for future commercial purposes (or so it seems, the area seems to be developing), but the place itself is noisy and I want a quiet place. would have to ask for mortgage. I guess I could get the owners to lower the price further, but if not, then fuck em.
- big ass 2-story house + 800sq.ft. lot for 130k (originally 150k). construction is solid 1st floor + wood. it's close to the one above but kind of "hidden" and quieter. best one I've found so far but the owner didn't want to lower a single cent more, would have to get a mortgage which scares me. owner told me the sewage pit is right under the house so I fear there might be something wrong with it. no idea who to hire to check that, though.
- old house + 450sq.ft. lot, built from the shittiest materials. close to the town center and VERY close to the beach. 1st floor is solid, but smells humid. 2nd floor will have to be completely rebuilt. offered the 90k, owners want 100k min. there is a small square at its side which doesn't make it too good (some fag said lots of shitty people visit it, drink and even sleep there). there are many other houses being sold in the surrounding area, which seems highly suspicious.
which one would you get if you were in my shoes, and why?
That this is how you get them to like you. It's not like someone told me that specifically, but I always had this belief.
Is it really that common for losers to think this way? Why is it? I am autistic btw.
Tonight I'm noticing that a lot of my clothes are missing when doing my weekly laundry.
I go downstairs and open a dryer and there they are. All my clothes mixed in with someone elses, specifically it was all my underwear and undershirts and a really expensive cotton undersuit for cold climates. all this shit is probably worth like $200
My clothes smell funny like cheap perfume, the clothes that my clothes were mixed in with were fucking FILTHY.. like deep yellow stains and shit marks
I waited for like 20 minutes for the person but they never came down. I also realized that I likely abandoned my clothes so its not really theft
but fuck.. what would you do? Would you just wash these clothes or throw them all out? Whoever had my clothes doesn't seem mentally stable
I have serious worries that nobody actually fucks for the first time sober. unless theyre really young. but if someone were to live in sobriety, but still sleep around with people they like and who like them and both are down, but for whatever reason you couldnt be with them romantically for even the medium term- would the sex just basically have to suck? and maybe you still like talking to them and doing things with them and maybe they’re a coworker and you enjoy that a lot. does sex just have to be stressful and shitty?
the question might be too specific. but when i was early 20s and all my friends were finding their now long term gfs, everyone was getting drunk and fucking. and doing things that as a more grown adult would make everyone look twice and get freaked out. but if the relationship started with a high, it stayed enough to make it to regular life, where sex probably does usually suck.
I had some kind of a naive introduction to drugs at some point so I know what the fuck does what but like. I want to be a good person and shit. I get huge amounts of catharsis whenever I chose a life option that leans toward sobriety, I dont want to lose that, it feels good. it feels good, I want another.
I'm an intelligent guy and am overeducated; I feel like I understand how things work in the world, I feel like I can predict in what ways the films or books I read will go, I feel like I know the basic answers that can be given to the big questions.
The things that used to excite me are much less exciting - experiential, but also intellectual, which has always been very important for me. I've been feeling like that for a while, so I am really looking actively for new exciting horizons, but I feel that everything I find still plays by overall the same rules that I already understand. I'm not depressed, but I start to feel a certain sneaking genuine dread: will I need to go around for another 50 years just seeing more of the same, jaded, with no feeling of discovery?
The one thing I think will be really "fresh" and mind&heart-expanding is to start a family, but I feel like I should come to that with some foundation of my own, not to treat it as a pyramid scheme. Do smart people just understand life (to the degree possible) and it's a plateau from there? Will it be ...flat from now on?
Anyone else had any experience with similar feelings? What can be productively done?
It occurs to me that I go to work, spend 8 hours looking at a small screen, then go home and spend basically the remainder of the day staring at my big screen.
The modern IV-drip bag of hyper-stimulating content is extremely addicting and for me, nothing seems to compare. At the same time, I hate it. My brain feels so much better if I read instead of scroll. If things keep going this way, it'll be another ten years in the blink of an eye, and I'll still just be sitting here. So if not now, then when? And how?
tl;dr - how do you get off mr. bones wild ride?
>Bonus, does anyone of retention methods?
The tasks I'm assigned to are pants on head retarded, but they are retarded in a way that makes them hard to implement.
The implementation requires brain power but I know I'm using my brain power to make something that is ultimately retarded and useless.
This is depressing me. This is making me want to kill myself. I build shit I don't believe in and I work for a guy who I truly believe is below 80 IQ, he got a big inheritance from his dead dad and thinks he's an entrepreneur. He's not. I hate him. I really, really, really hate him and I want to kill him.
My life is a lie, I build the features he asks me to and as far as he knows they make sense, but they don't make sense, the product is stupid and useless, we have no clients, and I don't care. I just want the money. I just do what his stupid brain asks, and it's making me feel stupid.
The thing is, the pay is decent, the job isn't THAT hard and I can coast sometimes, and the current job market is an absolute shitshow.
I have about 500k saved up. I can live off it for a decade.
Would you quit if you were in my position? And rethink your life for a year?
Then, five years later, I try Facebook again and send out the typical requests to the “people you might know” - one of them was a friend of the mentioned girl (didn’t know it was her friend). Soon enough, she’s in my DMs having an absolute meltdown, telling me she won’t forget what I did to her and that I need to leave her and her friend alone - because apparently I had raped her.
That scared me so fucking much. I had never even met this girl. We live half a country apart too.
It hurt especially hard because I was actually a victim to sexual assault that same year.
I didn’t know what to say so I just apologised and promised to never reach out again.
It’s been 10 months since that outburst happened and I haven’t heard anything from either of them, so I guess it’s over?
I’m so fucked scared I’ll get “exposed” or sued over something that literally didn’t happen.
I’ve dealt a lot with suicidal thoughts and got over that, but I know that the stress of something happening related to that will be too much and I might end it on the spot.
I live a panicked, paranoid and anhedonic life, knowing that each moment a crazy person can decide to essentially kill me for no good reason.
What helped me in the past was reading R*ddit posts of people sharing “crazy girlfriend” texts, especially those from people who are suffering from BPD because they mimic the unhinged, nonsensical and malicious stream of consciousness I found in my inbox that day, and give me hope that maybe no one will take a crazy person seriously - or rather that she just had a weird episode and forgot about me entirely.
Whenever I leave the house I get worried of her seeing me, being “reminded of me” and taking action.
What can I do? I want to be happy.
Anyways, there's this douchbag at work who's like a loudmouth, asshole, quick to anger and hates my ass because I mog him. He was talking with a lot of people and in centre of attention, and caught a lot of people's attention, including hers. She stared at him for a really long time.
The guy noticed, and then next day, he started dressing up, and going near her and signal her, she was uninterested actually and evade him most of the day. He got mad, but somehow the guy keeps going the next day. What do I do? I think he knows she likes me too, but I haven't made a move, and he's trying his hardest to cuck me, even though her #1 is me right now, but I'm scared to ask her out because it isn't obvious, she's quiet and introverted and shy, and isn't direct, so these nonverbal cues aren't good enough for me to ask her out.
She's also almost exactly like me personality wise, to the point where I thought she was my clone, literally so similar to me, it's out of this world.
I am already settled with a well paying job and my girlfriend finished high school two years ago. This year she wants to begin her studies which will take her between 4-5 years. I do not have a problem with her studying, my problem is that I want to have children sooner rather than wait half a decade later, and plan to marry her this or the next year. The things is, she doesn't want to have children (obviously) while she is studying. Another problem is that I and her are devout Christians, so within matrimony I do not want to use contraceptives of any kind since it is a grave sin in God's eyes.
She thinks it isn't a problem and that I am too legalistic, even though she knows it is a mortal sin. I do not want to wait five years to marry her as to have sex properly, as God intended, but I also do not want marry her now and have sterile sexual relations for five years until she finishes her studies. Her reasoning is that she wants a safety net in form of a degree in case I might die or whatever the case so she can work and take care of herself and potential children. Sounds noble on paper but I wish she'd have full trust in me to take care of her, even after I might die or become terminally ill. She is so insistant with this because her father brought her mother into a similar situation through which her academic degree saved her family financially.
My family always depended on the single income of my father and we got through with it, so I have no doubt in my mind about my provided to her as long as I live. She loves me dearly but she will not give up her studies and the possibility to have a security. With all that comes that she is not very experienced with how the world works and I do, and I know a degree is not a safe way to money or employment, plus five years wasted plus expenses for the whole studies.
To make it short, I do not want to contracept nor to wait. What do
I'm very sure I'm in love with this guy, we've talked personal stuff a few times, gotten a bit closer(?) However, I still don't know if he feels the same way about me. I looked it up on the internet to see if anybody's gone through the same and ended up dating/marrying their CFI and at least I know I'm not alone. Some of the advice I was given before by users here have also helped, so thank you for that.
I love flying, this much is true. But I love flying with him even more. I stopped myself today from asking if he wanted to do something together after today's flight, I don't know how he'd take it. And I don't want to lose him or cause unnecessary tension, but I want to get to know him better and ultimately date him.
I don't know what to do. Do I bite the bullet and ask him out? Play it safe and keep him close, but not too close? Wait for us to know each other better? Wait until I get fully certified before I ask him out? Am I making a mistake? I'm still lost and praying for answers. Any advice you guys have would be appreciated.
Btw, I don't know if he is single and I am too afraid to ask.
Early on when I started dating her she had a breakdown right after sex. This happened about 2 more times and I would comfort her each time. I didn't know exactly what it was about at the time, but I could tell that she had some kind of sexual trauma.
I've never really dealt with something this heavy before so I haven't been prying into it since she told me.
I've basically just been carrying on like before, but I wanna know what I can do to support her.
I'm one of maybe 2 people she's told in her personal life. She didn't tell her family. Only her therapist, the nurse she saw after it happened, and she alluded to telling her best friend that something happened but didn't give her full disclosure.
She said it was years ago, so I'm assuming while she was in college or high school.
When I asked her if she went to the police she said she didn't want to make a big thing about of it because then all her friends would start reaching out about it so I'm assuming the person who did this to her is within her social circle, but I haven't learned of their identity yet.
She blames herself for it, I think because it was someone she trusted.
I don't know any more details about it than what I posted and haven't discussed this with anyone until today, its been 2 weeks since she told me.
I keep pushing it to the back of my mind and trying to just show her a good time and be as loving as possible, but I feel like just ignoring it isn't the answer and I need to figure out some way to help her.
Are there any guides on how to do that? This topic feels like such a mine field, and I don't know how or when to even bring it up with her.
A female friend sat next to me at lunch at the work cafeteria, and for some reason my autism really kicked in today. I started breathing manually and my hand shaked a little while eating the food. I was friendly and answered her questions but I was just awkward today. I think out of pure exhaustion from finals.
Later on today she came up to me while I was sitting with another guy and was talking to him but not really to me. I texted her a joke later (we text regularly) and she liked the message but didn’t respond.
Am I overthinking things? Is our friendship over?
have any other anons been in a similar situation and/or recovered from that?
I'll check the thread frequently but I'm posting this quite late my time so I may fall asleep.
So, what do you guys think?
![1714484564847325[2]](https://i.4cdn.org/adv/1714484852820351s.jpg)
>be assertive about it and give credible points
>people just respond by saying you look like this when you do
Why am I never taken seriously?
I get sidetracked way too easily and I can't stick to plans because I get distracted or don't remember.
What do? ADHD meds? Meditation? Nofap?
>Have dream about visiting friend's college
>Walking the halls and bump into elementary school crush/gf (memories are foggy)
Aydia?
Anon?
>We hit it off instantly
>Dreaming so time is fluid and we're dating at this point
>She's sweet, a little crazy, flirtatious, and nerdy
>She's sitting in my lap while I hug her tenderly
>Suddenly realize that this is a dream
>Try to get her number before I wake up in the hopes that my brain conjures the right numbers
>Too late, wake up squeezing my pillow the same way I was holding her
Bros I'm seriously considering combing through my elementary school yearbook to find her. Jesus Christ I'm touch starved. Last serious relationship was two years ago. The cruelest place in this world is man's mind.
How do I deal with this emptiness? It's like I'm going against some fundamental piece of myself for not hugging a gf from behind and gently kissing her head.
Should I listen to this "calling" or ignore it?
It seems like option A would be more satisfying and is what I actually want to DO, but option B is what I imagined myself doing since I was a kid, and if I went with option A i think I'd feel bad for letting myself down.
I asked her what about everything she said about me, and all she said was that she meant all of it but her mind changed. How tf does ur mind change in the span of a week like that?
I know she is mentally unstable, but man. Wtf.
Haha just kidding, I wrote this because I thought it would be funny if you saw the photo and were like WTF, did she take this picture or find it online and send it to other people? but really its just me being a retard, I thought this would be a really funny post idea.
I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef i love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef I love you chef i love you chef
I fucking LOVE King Crimson
the man i thought was my best freind just broke up w me over text.
AMA, give advice or tell your own stories- any interaction is appreciated rn
I've been out of school for 4 years now. When I was in school, I never had to really try; I generally never scored below 80s on tests, though I barely passed most of my classes due to often not doing homework. I do not believe I have studied a single time in my life.
In the time after highschool I havent really done anything, I picked up a job, got good at it and just live day to day. Now, however, Ive realized I havent actually *used* my brain in the slightest in a very long time, and Ive begun to notice the effects of this, most notably that I'm now frequently forgetful and have trouble commiting things to memory. So, I decided I would actually need to sit down and commit time to *learning*, choosing to learn a language because I felt that would be the best way to strengthen neural pathways and I like the future prospect of teaching english abroad.
All that said, my problem arises: Every time I attempt to study, think about studying, casually try to study, my brain feels physically ill. Something akin to dread, if you replaced the intensity of that feeling with a feeling of deep emptiness. Which probably doesn't make sense, but it feels very real. I've tried to breach this feeling by starting small, learning as little as possible so that I might begin to slowly learn more as Ive habitualized the act of 'learning', but to no avail, regardless of how little I intend on trying, it feels as though Im shackled. Im otherwise disciplined in my life, and am well aware of and have utilized the act of "you just have to do it." Nonetheless I find myself incapable of moving a pen or committing myself to study.
What the hell do I do? I refuse to give up but cannot find a way to move my brain in the right direction.
>wear a condom during sex all the time
>try to persuade her to go raw but she worries
>accidentally cum in her when condom breaks
>takes plan B
>all of a sudden tells me she's going out of state for school
>have one last romp with condom
>she leaves
>asks if I wanna go live with her
>tells me how she'll like to see just appear one day
>never do and just wait for her to come around the holidays
>she then stops responding to my texts and calls
>essentially breaks up with me by ghosting me
>still hurting
Red pill me about this relationship
Despite her promises to repay me, she never follows through. Once, she used family problems as an excuse not to pay me back, but then splurged on a large meal from KFC the next day.
I'm not one to confront people, so I'm unsure of what to do.
